Just A Mom from Ohio

What makes us able to switch overnight from asking for help to rejecting help in the morning?  She was so excited about this plan to wear a dress, jewelry, a special hairstyle and nails. Nails were done the night prior and hair started. Morning came and it was not happening. Not only was it not happening, it was going in reversal. Her and I are a lot alike and neither of us are morning people. Getting to school and work without disappointment and disruption is an obstacle. Thankfully this bump in our road became a teaching and reflection for my walk with Jesus and won't be wasted.  Just the night before I had started reading Gentle and Lowly by Dane Ortlund . The subtitle of the book is The Heart of Christ for Sinners and Sufferers. Something I read last night clicked this morning as I looked at my daughter. I imagined Jesus as he listens to our prayers, empathizes with us, weeps with us, and is with us as we ask for the next move and then we refuse to go. What did He do wrong...

Driving on a warmish spring like March day in Ohio, I popped in an old cd. It was so familiar and engaging. It got me thinking about leaving behind some type of soundtrack of my life to grandchildren so they could "get me"  more than from someone else's faded memory. With each of the songs I would want to leave a note. By the end of the soundtrack, they could understand the way the world and the gospel intertwined in my life. Listening to the first few songs on this 20 year old cd reminded me just how many people could relate to those lyrics. My future grandkids probably could too. Often I write about music because I have always been able to connect to the lyrics, a beat, or a guitar riff quickly. I genuinely love music. I am in a season of reengaging with music again. I had been strict about the amount of mainstream music I allowed in but I was really missing something with a bit more edge. Now I've finally caved and subscribed to a music platform so I can choose the...

How would you answer this application question that was recently asked in a women’s Bible study: “How attached are you to your reputation? To your stuff?” In high school I wrote a poem called “Strange Popularity” and that phrase is one that makes so much sense to me. I was known more than popular. I was hardly noticed and then I was being talked about. It was uncomfortable to go from being almost invisible to being so exposed.  God has reminded me in life that my reputation is not mine to manage. I have no problems being vulnerable to a point it might alarm people. As I keep re-writing this blog, I recognize that I never could really manage what was said of me or how my life was going to go. If it wasn’t an option then, it hardly seems worth hiding now. However, I also am aware that at times our story can be taken and used in ways that do not end up reflecting well upon God. At the end of the day, that is truly all that matters.  Miriam Webster Dictionary defines “exposed” as ...

Attempting to finish my  the homework in Bible study workbook before it starts tonight - anyone else relate? This is my second study at the church and I am loving it. Regardless if I can completely keep up with the homework, I am growing.  This week we reviewed  Matthew 18 and that is where I am pausing to reflect and write this blog.  Answering questions about The Parable Of The Lost Sheep right after the conversation of Who Is The Greatest impacted me. The little ones Jesus spoke about hits a nerve. I had been reviewing these questions at my son's soccer practice while my daughter tried to occupy herself. She was looking through her True Girl subscription box for January and it included a journal. I was telling her my study was kinda like the study we get to do with True Girl. If you never heard of True Girl, check it out .   She wanted to know more about what I was answering. We ended up talking about the Lost Sheep. My daughter really...

For 2021 my word of the year is " Jesus ".  My daughter and I were talking about my word of the year board from last year and together we came up with my new word. I usually choose a feeling word or an action but when she said Jesus, it felt perfect. And on this 3rd day of the new year, I feel confirmation that it is indeed the word and person I need to focus on.  My words in past years have included: surrender, release, content, and stand. During those years, my antenna we're up and I paid extra attention to any mention of those topics. My intention with my 2021 word is to strip away any gimmicks or facades and get to know Jesus better.  In 2020, I watched the first season of The Chosen . That show helped me look at Jesus, to humanize Jesus for me. It is hard to remember sometimes how Jesus is both fully God and fully man. I so enjoyed making connections about Jesus' relationship with the disciples, especially Peter. It was encouraging to vis...

Anyone else out there have the song "You're Welcome" stuck in their head? It's from a newer Disney movie, Moana. I actually do like this movie better than Frozen, maybe because it is more lively and colorful. The music is better too. My daughter sings the "How Far I'll Go" water song as if it was "Let It Go". The "You're Welcome" song and the attitude of the demigod, Maui, voiced by Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson (whose WWF or WWE character I quite enjoyed back in the day) caught my attention. At first, I was not thrilled about my kids learning about demigods but a friend helped me out with a truth that at least I can discuss this stuff with my kids in my own home.  I can explain that other people have different beliefs and not everyone knows Jesus. But it doesn't change what we know to be true about Jesus' love for us. Back to the song, the arrogance is what stands out the most. This character is essentially ...

I'm so glad I decided to keep the latest Britt Nicole cd just for me. It was on sale during the Black Friday event and I grabbed it thinking I may give it out as a gift. I love music and eventually, like January, I opened it as a gift to me. My 3yo daughter really loves this one song in particular, No Filter. I enjoy it too but its just so cute that she requests that I play the "picture nus" song. The lyrics speak to me about how its so easy to portray my life, particularly through social media, but even just with family or at church, that things are going great. We can get good on putting on an act, don't we. Part of it might be that I don't want to burden anyone or I don't even understand what the problem is. Some things are best to be private between a couple or family. I think it gets interesting when we deal with the pressure to be "ok" and "happy". Are people going to be able to come along side of you and offer support if they aren...

I feel like there should be a 12 step program for surviving parenting. 1) I had a child and my life has become unmanageable. I have not decided if I am truly powerless in this step. In fact, the more ways I try to prove to myself I have power, I am quickly reminded that I am not harnessing that power well. Hence, it is why I start discipline books but don't finish them, and find myself like a mouse on a wheel, spinning and unaware of the cage I am in. So here I am trying to improve my life for my kids and family but I hit this wall and wonder if I am doing too much. In the last month I started weaning my son, have stopped eating ice cream and cookies every night, and restarted the serious potty training of no pull ups in the house except during sleeping. Mentally these are all high on my priority list but to physically implement them is challenging. They all involve a physical and mental component of the body and mind. I can learn to like kale. Over time it is growing on me...